A couple of years ago, on a crisp and sunny October day, I left my office for a lunch break and drove to a local cafe. Many students waited in line and filled the outdoor tables. As I walked in, an attractive young woman, who appeared to be about 17, approached me. She wore fashionable distressed skinny […]
Innocent until proven guilty by a jury of one’s peers. This is the basis of our criminal justice system, an appropriate and just forum when guilt is questioned. Often missing from this equation, however, is true accountability, especially in the juvenile court system. We are taught not to admit guilt in this system, which results […]
Before my 6-week-old son, Jasper, was even conceived, he was already teaching me one of the most valuable lessons of my life so far. It took my husband and me nearly three years to finally welcome our first child, and it wasn’t until two years into that process that I received the insight I needed […]
Our most lasting gifts come from how we are raised by our parents. Parenting Now! , formerly Birth To Three, asked community members to reminisce about their upbringing. Here are excerpts from their responses.
“Born in 1930 just as the Depression was descending on almost all families, I know my parents had a difficult time running a small business and raising my brother and me. Despite the times, my parents were always upbeat. I learned that money was not important, but behavior was. Good manners were insisted on and doing what is right and fair was firmly embedded in our psyches.”
How do we begin? First, by defining the problem to be outside, separate from ourselves. An example might be, “We need to find a better way to deal with the laundry” (a situation) rather than, “You never help with the laundry” (which makes your partner the problem).
Another important piece of the fearless problem-solving process is for each person to say what each wants in regard to the situation, rather than what’s wrong about it. For some of us, saying what we want is more unfamiliar and challenging than to say what’s wrong. However, an essential part of defining the problem is listening to and exploring what each wants and how close or far apart the wants are.
For young children, play is the means through which they access the world around them. Play is how they learn how things work, how to get their needs met, how to interact with others, and all of the concepts and skills they need to learn.
For you as a parent, play is your passport, the entrance to building a supportive, nurturing relationship with your child. You provide your child with food, clothing and shelter to meet your child’s basic care needs. But what do you provide to meet your child’s developmental needs?